At Your Own Risk

I'll tear you to shreds if you get into a verbal argument with me. I can go for 70 hours and then some. No one beats me with words. You better just shut the fuck up and pick your problems carefully. If words fail, don't even think of pulling out a knife, you fucking coward. My mind is sharper and I can slice you to bits with it alone. I'd drink your blood if not for the disgusting taste of inbred and deficient DNA.

If you push far enough, I'm going to fuck you up. Nothing personal. It's just generations of taking the abuse and garbage, piling up. Lifetimes upon lifetimes. I'm asking you to be nice, or I won't be. You get angry, a lot. You think you know anger? (laughs). I'll show you anger like you wouldn't believe, I'll melt your fucking mind with my anger. I'll sever your connections, you'll be fumbling for basic words. I'm going to show you what a cornered rabbit looks like when it unzips its fur and a rabid wolverine comes out, born in the bowels of hell. Speaking of bowels. I'll make you shit your stale hand me down pants. I'll loosen your weak bladder. I'll show you what the definition of surprise is. There won't be enough coffee and cigarettes to relax you after this one. You'll wish you saw it coming. I'll bend metal, I'll break glass, I'll tear down the walls and reduce them to dust in my hands.

I'll shove my foot up your sorry slipshod ass and kick your fucking shitty teeth out from the inside and send them flying like wedding confetti. Destiny has an appointment with you, did you know that? I have invisible tattoos of your name on my fists, elbows, forehead, fangs and legs. Better hope the future is not that static. Your begging and manipulations and lies won't help you. I've read you inside out like a cheap dime novel that I already pissed all over and threw into the bonfire. You think I'm all over the place? I'll be in every spot in the world simultaneously, there's no escape. You can't kill a ghost. Save your energy because you'll fucking need it. I hope you eat a good lumberjack slam breakfast before we get started, because you'll be burning a lot of calories quick.

You better kick me when I'm down, it's the most honorable thing after all, isn't it? You better bootfuck me as fast as possible, because if I get up, they'll be no second chance for you.
God put me here on this earth, I'm an experiment on what happens when you push and push and push and push and push and push and push and push and push and push and push and push and push and push and push and push and push and push and push and push and push and push and push and push and push and push and push and push and push and push and push and push and pushandpushandpushandpushandpushandpushandpushandpush.

You talk about problems. I've faced 'problems' to make yours look like specks of crumbled cookie. My bank of forgiveness is overdrawn, and you owe me the service fees. Pay up, motherfucker. I'll use the funds to pay your ferry to the underworld. You better watch the 6 o' clock news, because your going to be on it. The only fame you'll ever receive.

You are so fucking stupid, you've had almost twice as long as me and you still didn't figure it out. All the small shit you're in love with, it's compost in the end. You thought it was good eats too. I drank from the Spring of Life itself. You say you don't believe in God, well you better because he's going to judge your idiot ass. I gave him open channel to flow through me, now how the fuck are you going to wrestle with GOD himself? You really think you are going to beat the Creator and Destroyer and Preserver of all things? Your shitty ass is on borrowed time. Better face death quick and stare it down like I do daily. How can you possibly hope to win? Resign yourself, you stupid shitpiglicking retard fucker. This is your early warning. If you smell smoke, yes there is probably a fire.

Eddie Vedder Wigs Out

Awesome.

SPIRALS

Pics by Joachim Sampa.

Dreamchasing Again

So another odd dream came about, I'd say quite Lynchian actually. My good friend owned a farm on the outside of town, yet lived in a house totally separate more inside the city. It was a hobby farm of sorts and infrequently visited. We had to take possession of one of the ponies there and relocate it, maybe because the farm was being sold perhaps? Since we both were car-less and without licenses, there was plan to take a sort of cargo taxi and get the pony that way. My friend's mother was remarking how the pony would probably be too skittish and end up hoofing us. As well, my friend only had some oversize honky cowboy belt as a leash and not a proper lasso. We took a cargo cab to the farm. It was gloomy, maybe twilight, a bit crisp out. Some apple trees were nearby and a good number of the apples fell on the ground to rot. By using our great animal charming powers, we managed to get the pony into  a green wheelbarrow and then into the taxi. The fare was becoming astronomical as we were taking some time to do this.

Then we were driving on a strip of road going down a large hill, cutting through mixed valleys with sort of strip mall/surburban/wild scenery. By this time night lights were showing.  I nudged my pal and told him to check out the sights. He was like "naww, I live around here, I see it all the time." But then there was a building on fire, blazing away into the evening air. I more urgently was trying to get him to look. It's as if I woulda had to hit him with a shovel for one little look! He eventually gazed over and was like "WHOA! Fire!" I was like, yeah, no shit! We kept driving. It was getting close to paying time and he paid his share, then I realized I had no cash only debit. The taxi driver said only credit cards and cash were accepted, for whatever dumb reason. I pulled out a credit card from my old leather wallet and it was cut in half. My realization was that it was an old card I somehow bothered to cut but not throw out! So then I was thinking of making the cabbie stop by a bank so I could make a withdrawal! Either that or pick up some credit card I left with somebody at  a bar. Sometime around there the dream ended. I'm not sure how I'll end up chasing this dream in real life. I did just call said friend and he wasn't there...was out at some board game night somewhere. Do we have to find some farm with ponies and go there together? Maybe take a taxi to get there? I s'pose, dreamchasing, as with anything, gets easier the more one tries it.

By Blackhawkrocket on DeviantArt

Dreamchaser

Dreams are strange things, yet can be very helpful. In the least, they help us sort out extra noise in our heads while we sleep. To use computer lingo they are kinda like a defragmentation of the mind. In more mystical pursuits, dreams can be seen as divinely inspired or revelatory. Have you ever thought of chasing your dreams? What that phrase could mean would be something like: winning the lottery, becoming a doctor, traveling to New Zealand, that sort of stuff. 'Dreams' as in things we aspire to or hope to experience. I do encourage that sort of dreamchasing, but in this piece here the type of dreamchasing discussed is a LITERAL following of the dreams you had while sleeping, or at least to the best of your ability as translated in 'real world' form. It is done almost as a sport or hobby just like parkour, kite flying, football. You find some aspects of your dream that are familiar, and 'chase' them. The idea is that our inner self knows best and holds many answers, and sometimes one of the best ways to mine gold from our inner self is via dreams. By chasing them in the 'real' world, we make progress in living.

For example, I had a mishmash of weird dreams the night before last. I couldn't remember details, but it was almost like the details were trying to distract me from an important name that came to me: Ralph Houzan. I almost forgot the name several even before waking. I wrote it down as soon as I awoke, and if I hadn't done that I surely would have forgotten. I mean, Ralph I might have remembered, but Houzan was too unusual. So how would I choose 'chase' this dream? If it were say 20 years ago, I'd be checking a phonebook or something, maybe find a real Ralph to stalk, haha. In this age a simpler way is to do a web search. I wasn't expecting anything much, or anything pointing to obvious meaning. What I found were many links for cool shit regarding throwing blades and the art heretofore. Ralph Houzan doesn't have to be a person, maybe just a name to trigger the search.
For images, I found more throwing blades ...and race cars. I suppose Houzan seems to be a Japanese name. Coolness. Alright, so how do I chase further?

 

searching for meaning...Japanimbos included

It's important to dissolve as much ambiguity as possible and not lose focus. Dreams are already vague or multifaceted to begin with. So maybe I shouldn't bother about page 1000 on a search kind of deal. The biggest impression is the throwing knife shit and race cars. Maybe it means I have to learn to be faster and more precise. That's more in the realm of how I would interpret the stuff if it were still in the dream though. However, this stuff was not in the dream, it was resultant from keywords or a name from the dream. So I have to be a bit more material and literal. Maybe it means I should take up rally racing or knife throwing or something like that as a hobby. Maybe it means I should contact my friend who lived in Japan a lot of his life. I also think the links to these following sites stand out as most interesting at a quick glance:
http://23narchy.com/archive/11/2009?page=8
http://flyingsteel.com/links/
It's a lot easier to dreamchase when you dream about something or someone you know exists and is close to you in your life, ie if I were in the downtown square of my city in the dream talking to an old man, for the dreamchase I'd actually go there and try to speak to some old dude and find some truth towards something. I'm still chasing..