FUCK HATS

click to enlarge

click to enlarge

The above comix strip, illustrated by Sam Henderson, shows the great things that could happen to people who wear 'fuck hats', including becoming president of the United States. It's the original cool, dig? It's essential to get one if you want a keen edge playing the game of life. How do you acquire one? Probably the best place to find one would be a novelty/head/rock shop in your area, or online. Here's an actual photo of an actual, real life, true blue yellow fuck hat:

It's important to notice the difference between a true fuck hat and a 'not quite on the mark' fuck hat. For example, this one shown below, the 'fuck you you fucking fuck' hat, will likely cause you to be beat with a club or shot (depending on how bad of an area you're in) rather than be admired and elevated to become president of the U.S.A. :

The Cyber Genie That Knows (Almost) All

Dug this up from my old files-> http://us.akinator.com/. This is the abode of the Akinator, this sorta web genie who plays '21 questions' with you, and USUALLY, remarkably, guesses the person you are thinking about. It can't be cousin Stewie, it's gotta be a fairly famous person. Well, sometimes Akinator will guess your own mother or whoever but not by name anyhow.  Sometimes he has to go beyond the 21st question as well. It helps if you give him really precise and accurate answers. That's all.

High Wattage

This is going to be a section on Mike Watt. Who is Mike Watt, if you don't know? He's an alternative/punk rock legend who plays bass (or as he puts it, the 'thud staff '.) He has been rockin' ever since the 70's. Watt grew up in San Pedro California and in his early teens met his good guitarist friend D.Boon there. They found themselves in a punk band called the Reactionaries, and then after that they took the Reactionaries' drummer George Hurley to form the Minutemen. The Minutemen tended to have a sound a bit more quirky, eclectic and humorous than many of the contemporary hardcore punk bands of the nearby scene at the time. They had a certain kinship with noted and rightly notorious L.A. band Black Flag, who duly respected them. Watt even ended up getting into a romantic relationship with one of Black Flag's bassists, Kira Roessler. The output of the band was quite prolific for the time they existed (from 1980-1985), with the 1984 album 'Double Nickels on the Dime' being the standout for most, with the original release featuring 45 songs!   

The sad demise of the Minutemen came about when D. Boon was killed in a van accident heading to Arizona December 22, 1985. Mike Watt and George Hurley grew too depressed and disillusioned to really give too much thought to continuing with music. Yet somehow they still did, at the coaxing of some friends. First Watt was invited to guest star on some songs with Sonic Youth (the 'Ciccone Youth-Whitey Album' project and some work off of 'EVOL').  A chap named Ed Crawford brought the remaining Minutemen together and he essentially replaced D.Boon for guitar/vocal duties, yet the band was now called fIREHOSE. As well, Mike slowly formed a band with Kira Roessler called 'Dos', which is essentially just the two playing bass. Kira had made some contribution to the Minutemen's final album ('3 Way Tie For Last') also got had a bit of involvement with fIREHOSE. The pair ended up marrying in '87, though divorced not too long after fIREHOSE disbanded in '94. The divorce was on good terms however, and Dos continues to exist as a here and there project (as it always has).

The weirdass cover art to 'Ball Hog or Tugboat?'

In 1995, Mike Watt went solo and a landmark first album was released, 'Ball Hog or Tugboat?'. This album should be considered very important in the annals or true alternative/underground rock. A gazillion special names in the genre were invited as guest stars on the record, including: Dave Grohl and Krist Novoselic of Nirvana, Dinosaur Jr's J. Mascis, Eddie Vedder of Pearl Jam, Cris and Curt Kirkwood of the Meat Puppets, Pat Smear (once in the Germs, once a touring guitarist for Nirvana, now in the Foo Fighters with Dave Grohl), Gary Lee Conner and Mark Lanegan of the Screaming Trees, Henry Rollins (sang in Black Flag, went solo, punk GOD), Frank Black (the Pixies, solo), Soul Asylum's Dave Pirner, Sonic Youth (minus Kim Gordon), Jane's Addiction drummer Steven Perkins, RHCP bassist Flea, Evan Dando of the Lemonheads, Kira Roessler's brother Paul on piano, punk producer Spot, P-funk legend Bernie Worrell on B3 organ, some Beastie Boys, and so forth. Now, just the fact that all these people agreed to appear on this album is a testimony to the influence and genius of Mike Watt and his own bands. You could just picture the one scenario-- "Mike who? Who wants me on his record?" No, the thing that now stands is if you didn't know who he was before, it's good you are reading this because the man is legend in rock and roll history. The Red Hot Chili Peppers dedicated their entire epic album 'BloodSugarSexMagic' to Mike Watt. Oh and before I forget, besides all those guest appearances, the music itself on 'Ball hog' was quite nifty. 

After this album, Watt would go on to release more solo work plus collaborate on a trillion other projects. He has been a very busy man! In more recent times, the most notable thing he'd be up to would be layin' down bass for the revived line up of Iggy and the Stooges!

In his lustred career Watt has worked with (aside from the many already mentioned): Saccharine Trust, Stan Ridgeway, Juliana Hatfield, Nels Cline, Banyan, Porno for Pyros, Burning Brides, and a whole bunch more I am now getting too lazy to mention (har har).

Watt's home site is http://hootpage.com/
As a bonus, below is a 'Glossary of Pedrospeak', which is the peculiar dialect Watt likes to speak:
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>><<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<
b
 bail – see out.
 ball bust  – major hell-ride.
 ball-hog  – rude bogart.
 ball swell  – tour wound.
 ball tick  – scene fixture.
 bam bam  – has to get going in order to complete
                     soundcheck.
 be great or be gone – tape rolling (see “ding-ding-ding!”).
 bean-spill  – accidental self spiel.
 Bell – gut pack, as in “bellin' it.”
 bellig –  as in belligerent, major tude.
 binga  – one lost sometimes.
 blow by  – prequel to loop.
 bofus –  literally, “I found it!”
 bogart  – bumrush.
 bomb pop –  watt on the 'loose nut' tour.
 bones  – see government art collection.
 boom stick –  see thunder broom.
 boss  – see him/her who deals.
 bout  – tunes.
 broister  – swelter pad.
 brother  – invaluable.
 butt snicker  – georgism, see floater/bottom fish.

c
 cave  – empty gig, ton of reverb.
 chick-ching  – the transferring of many bones.
 ching-kwon-dough  – more than one bone, as in “beaucoup
                                    dinero.”
 choad  – one who is hesitant.
 choke  – a fan at the plate.
 chopless –  lack of chops.
 chow  – major part of experience.
 clams –  chokes, usually on stage in front of people.
 coiler  – expression sculpted in a “coiling booth.”
 concussion pad  – tour van seat prop.
 corporate pawn  – obvious palooka.
 cuda  – tour mode that promotes heavy chowing.
 cut  – big scissors.

d
 davein' it  – christening the pad.
 “ding-ding-ding!”  – sound of tape beginning to roll.
 dumper  – chow purge.

e
 econo  – a way or life.
 elbow pop –  behind a motorhome shit drain/breakage on
                       freeway.

f
 first engineer scott  – crew member on Watt's phone
                                    machine.
 flick –  georgism, off the back of a motorcycle.
 floater  – if you're really healthy (“bottom fish” if you're
                 not).
 flow –  float the trip.
 frap  – george's wake-up greeting.
 fully blown  – georgism, all the way live.
 fuego  – required by mota.

g
 georgism  – that which is coined by George [Minutemen
                     drummer George Hurley]
 gordo  – bloat.
 government art collection – them little green paintings.

h
 hambone  – solo.
 hand puppet  – someone seen butt-pickin' themselves.
 headslap  – alarm clock-like.
 head pop  – right off the knee.
 hell-ride  – tour, big ride in van.

i
 ...ian  – turning a vowel into a verb.

k
 kind  – just right.
 knee pop  – critical Watt injury/weakness.
 knobman  – sound engineer.
 koa  – as in hahd/your spirit.
 konk  – sleepytown.

l
 load dodge  – tradin' the rambler for a dodge.
 loop  – sequel to blow-dry.

m
 machinery  – plumbing.
 mackin'  – georgism, tongue wrangle.
 major nobody –  has-been that never was, average mersh.
 mat –  recording studio floor.
 mersh  – commercial.
 mota  – puff.
 mouse  – minion.
 mulehead  – stench breath.

n
 nolaning it – bap bap bap.
 nut sack  – scrotum.

o
 one-on-one tug-o-war  – solo record.
 out  – adios.
 out of the race  – passing a disabled vehicle.
 “over the ropes”  – out of the picture (see “scissors”).

p
 pad  – establishment.
 paralytic  – the manity's (as in hugh manity of orlando, fla)
                    puff.
 petri dish  – see ring.
 phone jock  – typical booking agent.
 piss bottle  – life saver.
 pomp  – Daltrey stage pose.
 pop  – sound made by my knee breaking.
 prac  – getting ready for the gig – in no way a “rehearsal”.
 practice pad  – where one pracs.
 pretendo  – mtv spiel.
 pucks – burgers.
 pull toy – little truck.
 pushbroom  – bass.
 push cart –  vw (see pull toy).

q
 q –  pedro chow down.

r
 rehearsal – for actors & actresses, not band people.
 ring – the recording studio, as in “get in the ring.”
 rope trick –  stage holding banter, have to fold it.
 round – tune.

s
 sailor – militant band member.
 salmo-bloat – see short stay.
 shtick – endeavor.
 scissors – cut.
 shadow box – see davein' it.
 shelf life – there is no life beyond shelf life.
 short stay – quick dumper after weak chow.
 shovel – chow.
 sidemouse – one who does your chow while waiting for
                      theirs.
 slackjaw – alert and at attention.
 sour – certain look that says something.
 spiel – pitch (see “shtick”).
 sploogie boy – martin gig.
 splorch wart – big mug zit.
 springboard – to flow for others.
 spunk pad – run down joint.
 square john – (your name here)
 star of the show – least valuable player.
 stuff – chow.
 swim team – nut sack crew.

t
 team motto – “when you ain't playin' you're payin'.”
 thunder broom – bottom tool.
 tired – clone soldier stance.
 tour-spiel – old sea yarn.
 trainwreck – ensemble playing.
 tub – brain.
 tude – as in pomp.
 tug – persuade.
 tugboat – nurturer.
 twitch fire – georgism, “a looker.”
 twofer – duet.
 tymp – express instantly.

u
 unit – hair piece.
 utensil – mota device.

w
 wao – pipe filter.
 wail – freedom song.
 wang – clever person.
 wang towel – clean up crew (see sploogie boy).
 wigger – a go-off, as in heidi.
 wind baggin' – on the phone forever.

y
 yank – see cut.
 yard dog – liar.
 yard trophy – disabled ride.
 “you fuckin' bahstid!”  – sweet endearment.

Carnivorous Panda

photo by Jake Bacon

I always thought if I reincarnated I'd be a Carnivorous Panda. 'Oh, look that panda is so cute..chewing that stick of bamboo....oh wait...noooo!! He's chewing my arm!' See? It'd be great. Now, I have realized one of my brethren is on the maul in Flagstaff, Arizona. Beware! Here are some concept pictures fitting witness descriptions:

painting by The Weird Girl on DeviantArt

photo by FreezingDarkFantasy on DeviantArt

Living In Poo

Awhile back I mentioned this to some of my friends. Look above, it's the majestic sweet beauty of Poo. That's right, POO. It's a small town in Northern India in the state of Himachal Pradesh with a population of just over 1000. According to WikiPedia (god at times I hate habitually getting my info from there) Poo town is "renowned for its natural beauty, green fields, apricot orchards, vineyards and almond trees. Inscriptions suggest that Poo was an important trading center in the early 11th century." There are some cool ancient temples and shrines there as well. So the general idea is, are tourists going to want to travel to a place called Poo? Probably not. Compound that with the fact it is a small town in a remote location, and most people don't even know it exists to begin with, and boom...you have the perfect chillout hideaway. It sounds like a really nice place to get lost. A lot of places get spoiled by too much tourism and commercialism, you know? Perhaps in a future article I will report on a whole buncha towns and cities with bizzare and silly names.

Coco Crisp

I haven't religiously followed baseball since about 15 years ago, but the other night I was in a bar and saw a game playing on the TV. The dude up to bat was named Coco Crisp! Ahahaha! There's a guy named Coco Crisp! He even looks really silly!

BATMAN PSA

Hi, I'm Batman. You may remember me from such endeavours as...ah what the hell.... if you don't know who I am you probably were living in a cave for years. If you were, you might have recently noticed almost entire populations of bats dead on the floor, right after hibernation. This is caused by White Nose Syndrome, a more recent disease which is theorized to be caused by a certain fungus, doing what it should not be doing to bats. Soon, all North American bats may be extinct. Perhaps you think it may be no big deal, but just think of what you may be doing next summer or some other summer when you are bloodsucked dry by swarms of relentless mosquitos (some are becoming more resistant to repellents as well). One bat can eat 600-1000 pesky insects in just one hour. Think about that. So I, Batman, stand here to say we all face an enemy greater than the Joker, environmental devastation. We have to stop fucking with Mother Nature, because where would you be, WHERE WOULD I BE, without bats?

WIDESCREEN

                                                This is an announcement that this blog is now presented in widescreen format. Enjoy.

Undercurrent

 This is one of my favorite pictures ever. I first saw it from an old good friend of mine. The other day, I saw a  copy of the Bill Evans and Jim Hall jazz album 'Undercurrent'. The same pic was used for the cover art:

I was like hey! I've seen that before! I gave the album a good spin. The album is quite stripped down in sound and is pretty much jammin' around with just a piano and guitar.
It's a really mellow album, but it's what I like to call 'wallpaper music.' It's good to just throw on in the background and doesn't change too much. Kind soothing, kinda boring. Anyhow, here's what's supposed to be the original track listing of the album:
1.My Funny Valentine
2.I Hear a Rhapsody
3.Dream Gypsy
4.Romain
5.Skating in Central Park
6.Darn That Dream
7.Stairway to the Stars
8.I'm Getting Sentimental Over You

I was thinking it'd be cool to have a parody album called 'Underflow', and it'd be a lot less mellow and a lot more metal, and with a sort of rip-off photo on the cover, say, something like this:

 The track titles would be changed to:
1.My Bloody Valentine  (also a name of a cool group and scary movie!)
2.I Hear a Fallacy
3.Nightmare Gypsy
4.Rogaine
5.Skating on Thin Ice
6.Damn That Dream
7.Stairway to Hell
8.I'm Getting Apathetic Over You

I really like both the photos for 'Undercurrent' and 'Underflow.' Upon a bit of research I found out the photo for 'Undercurrent' is called 'Weeki Wachee Springs, Florida (1947)' by Toni Frissell. This led me further to find out about the place Weeki Wachee. It's one of those towns with less than 100 people, super small. The name came from Seminole Indian tongue, it means 'little spring'. The nearby springs (where the photo was taken) are a tourist attraction founded in 1947 by Newton Perry, once a U.S. Navy frogman. They are the only of their kind in the world, so deep the bottom has never been found. Reportedly, 117 million gallons of fresh new warm water bubble up from the springs every day. Though originally quite a rugged area more full of animals than people, slowly the tourist attraction was developed by Newt Perry. In some shallower spots, people had illegally dumped old fridges and cars and random pishposh. Newt cleaned it up, installed a sort of amphitheater with glass to see right under the water, brought in parking lots and all the rest-including mermaids. Mermaids?? Really? Well, he hired a bunch of pretty girls to dress up us them and sort of 'live' under the water for a steadily  increasing number of tourists to see. They were taught to be fluid and graceful and even do things such as eat and drink under water. They breathed by using hidden air-hoses. This became a huge attraction worldwide, and some girls from other corners of the earth came to audition to be mermaids.
Now the word wouldn't have spread so much if it wasn't in part for ABC buying the springs (trust them to ruin everything) and doing massive promotion just as the 60's were about to roll in. A corny Disney style twist was added when the mermaids began performing stories like 'Snow White' and 'Alice and Wonderland'. The tourist attraction also predated the town...which actually didn't exist until '66. Over the years many things transpired and many changes came about. At several points the springs were used as Hollywood film locations. Elvis was said to have visited them as well. Today, there are not only the mermaids..but a large water park, animal shows, a riverboat cruise, opportunities for water-sports (like diving and canoeing and kayaking), and more...including volunteering positions and training camps to 'learn to be a mermaid'.

T.O.T.T.

Q: What do all these have in common?
>Maurice Sendak, The Beatles, MAD Magazine, Sergio Aragones, Johnny Rotten, Sex Pistols, Terry Gilliam, Gun Club, Richard Corben, EC Comix, Alfred Hitchcock, John Wayne, Batman, R, Crumb, Hank Williams, Ramones,Wire, Peter Jackson, The Wipers, The Cramps, The Stooges, Bette Davis,The Velvet Underground, Johnny Thunders and the Heartbreakers, Saint Vitus, Stanley Kubrick, Frank Sinatra, King Kong, Mudhoney, H.R. Giger, George A. Romero, Harvey Keitel, Angelo Badalamenti, David Lynch, Beasts of Bourbon, The Coen Brothers, Jack Nicholson, Monster Magnet, Tim Roth, Type O Negative, Moebius, Roadrunner, Edgar Allan Poe, Johnny Cash, Quentin Tarantino, Deadwood, The Sopranos, Siouxsie & the Banshees, James Dean, Young Gods, The Simpsons,The Twilight Zone, Ray Bradbury, Charles Bukowski, Mark Lanegan, Harry Houdini, Marilyn Monroe, Prong, Pippi Longstocking, M.C. Escher, The Meteors, Dahiell Hammett, Motorhead, Freddy Krueger, Roman Polanski, Nosferatu, Donald Duck, The Fuzztones, Marlon Brando,Nina Hagen, Luis Buñuel, Steve Buscemi, Klaus Kinski, The Damned, Max Schreck, Sham 69, Christopher Walken, Gary Larson, Bad Brains, Scorn, Foetus, 999, Portishead, Windsor McCay, Chris Ware, Danzig, Al Pacino, Steven King, The Jesus and Mary Chain,James Gandolfini, Alan Vega, Suicide, Humphrey Bogart, Bram Stoker, Bettie Page, Francis Ford Coppola, The Shining, Buster Keaton, Joy Division, Dr. Jekyll & Mr. Hyde, Ennio Morricone, Christopher Lee, Bugs Bunny, Bollock Bros., Elvis, L7, Sepultura, Carnival of Souls, Twin Peaks, Sonic Youth, Tim Burton, Ed Wood, Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds, The Undertones, Dorian Gray, House of Pain, Jane Birkin, Tom+Jerry, Massive Attack, Blade Runner, Groundhog Day, Speedy Gonzales, Frankenstein, Sergio Leone, Dead Kennedy's, PJ Harvey, Dennis Hopper, Mark Ryden, Fassbinder, Jim Jarmusch, Will Eisner, Orson Welles, The Muppet Show, Marlene Dietrich, Adam West, Peter Lorre, Boris Karloff, Watchmen, Cypress Hill, Lee Hazlewood, The Munsters, Clint Eastwood.....

A: They are all influences of Thomas Ott (aka T.O.T.T.) Who is Thomas Ott? Only one of the best modern
adult graphic novelists/comic artists! His style is very dark, macabre, twisted, surreal, intelligent, and at times humorous. This is reflected in the scope of influences listed above (and these are just a fraction, there are so many more!) Notable books by him include 'Cinema Panopticum', 'Dead End', 'Greetings from Hellville', 'Tales of Error', 'Breakdown', and 'Exit'. On top of that, he has illustrated for random publications and magazines, done filmwork (including 'Fleisch', 'La Grande Illusion',  and 'Nocturne'), and has rocked out in different raunchy bands (Beezlebub, The Playboys, Lawmaker..).

Thomas busy at work corrupting our youth...note his awesome jagged lightning 'powerburns' (sideburns)

Thomas with a friend gaining some form of 'inspiration'...

You might find a lot of sites relating to Thomas and his work are in something like German.
This is because he's Swiss born (year '66) and is very active more so in Europe than other places (as far as I can tell). One prominent aspect of Thomas's method is the use of the 'scratchboard' technique. Another main part of his style is to almost never use dialogue or words in his books, the visuals (including the people's expressions) tell the story in itself (much like silent film in book form). Like the one Zen proverb goes: 'Say one word with your mouth shut'. If a picture is worth a thousand words, Thomas manages to say many words with his mouth shut. I'll let his pictures speak for themselves from this point here:

 

Thomas Ott's official site can be found at: http://www.tott.ch/
*Special note: I have disabled right clicking on my blog as of now (you can't save images from a menu) in order to help protect the artist's work according to their wishes. Certain artists (like Thomas Ott) have some of their work unsaveable as a way to keep if from wantonly being used for the 'wrong purposes'. There are many loopholes around this nonetheless, but if the artists prefer it that way and it gives them more peace of mind, so be it.

SPACEDANCE

This is like, really wicked. It's Raquel Welch doing a crazyass space people dance somewhere in Mexico probably back in 1970. Dig the trippy beatzz...

Note: If the screen is too small it is recommended that you click inside the frame once playing and watch it right on YouTube...

Temple of the Screaming Electron

Once upon a time there was a site called totse.com
This was one of the awesomest sites on the internet. The format was sort of a superforum where anyone could post anything they wanted, including Anarchist Cookbook style how-to's of illegal stuff. Just some of the topics discussed were: guns, homemade bombs, poison, hacking, locks and security, drugs, music and art, online zines, online transcriptions of famous books and texts, jokes, science fiction, self improvement, erotica, the supernatural, conspiracy theories, law, the media, politics, religion, and technology.  It was a great place to waste time and learn something new. The day I figured out it went down, I was sad. Shortly thereafter it seemed some people tried to compensate with some other similar sites, like 'totsepedia', which were paltry shadows of their predecessor. This was quite a while ago.

Today, I have seen out of the ashes something I could truly call the resurrection of totse.  There are still imitation sites, though now some have become as large as the original (it seems) - and with the same look and all the bells and trimmings. The most notable children of totse are: http://www.totse.info/,  http://www.zoklet.net/totse/ , and  http://www.totse2.com/totse. Indeed, it is hard to tell if these three are not pretty much identical twins, sharing a very strong resemblance to their mother.

It's not just any old forum site, or what you could easily find through Google or Wikipedia. Totse has a character entirely different. Wikipedia won't easily show you how to make ninja horseshit poisons, or start your own bed & breakfast. Google may be an avenue, but a long one at that.

One of the coolest things about totse is that it started before the internet itself, it started as a BBS (Bulletin Board System). For those of you too young to know what a BBS was, it was probably the type of thing paving the road for the internet well ahead of its time. Back in the era where PCs were just getting trendy, you'd take your shitty home computer and use a modem to dial up a certain number almost like dialing a fax machine. It'd dial into another modem on a host remote computer, and you'd have access to some public files on that computer. They could be little tidbit word files, small games, picture files. There would be a sort of graphical interface or personalized 'look' on the computer screen as you did your stuff on there. There was even the first chat and eventually head to head gaming. But we're talking real ghetto. Like the first Atari graphics and beeps and blips.

So in 1989, this one dude named Jeff Hunter started his own BBS apparently with a PC with only 20MB on the hard drive (that was actually pretty big then!) Mostly the BBS had a buncha text files, and Jeff wanted to have a place where people could be free to post just about anything they wanted. By the mid 90's, the internet became a household name and the totse BBS was eventually transferred to website form. For just over a decade, totse.com graced the waves and warps of the world wide web. By January 17th, 2009, Jeff decided to take the site down, as it was a lot of maintenance and high bandwidth, and anyone who hosts a large site knows bandwidth doesn't come free or even necessarily cheap. It seems somehow some others got a hold of a lot of the original DNA of the site (perhaps Jeff kindly gave them access) and made new babies from it. That's a win for everybody.

Korean Totem Poles

Called jangseung, these were placed just outside small villages as spirit guardians of sorts, fearlessly warding off demons. Likely these were created in the culture of Korean shamanic belief, known today as Muism or Sinism. They are usually humanlike caricatures carved out of wood, though sometimes made of stone. It is interesting to note that overseas across the Pacific the Native Americans in the Pacific Northwest region have made totem poles of their own. It has beem hypothesized that thousands of years back all Native Americans came from Asia across the Beringia land bridge (now the Bering Strait). Could we all have been one culture if gone far enough back along the great timeline?

Below are the Native American totem poles in comparison:





Relatively untouched totem poles at Skung Gwaii, Queen Charlotte Islands, British Columbia                                                                                                                               

  



More modern versions of totem poles in Stanley Park, Vancouver, British Columbia



WHY VINYL SUCKS

Jean Shin's Sound Wave art exhibit

Ages and ages the debate has raged on, vinyl records or compact discs? Here we are about to delve into the controversy and completely settle it 'for the record' (haha really bad pun).

There are so many factors that go into the final physical and sound quality of an LP or CD: recording, mastering, manufacturing, care and maintenance, and so forth.
Let's make the assumption for the sake of debate that all CDs and all vinyl records are recorded and mastered and manufactured and maintained equally, and see how they go toe to toe.

Vinyl is clunkier to store, weighs a ton in masses and takes up more space. This may not be a big deal if you only own like 10 records tops. If you are a hardcore sound connoisseur, chances are you would be owning hundreds. On top of that, if you were a DJ, moving all that vinyl from gig to gig is a healthy recipe for a hernia. For the same weight and space, you could store about 10 times the amount of CDs (or more). CDs win for portability and lightness hands down.

Packaging. Start with CDs. Jewel cases? What a joke of a name. As if they are really as precious as jewels. It's just shitty plastic. Digipaks? Cardboard. CD packaging, it is to be agreed, sucks as a whole. Yet look at vinyl. It's mostly cardboard and paper sleeves. Not much better! Though vinyl packaging is larger and so the artwork stands out a bit more. Looking at both mediums as a whole..if any packaging REALLY stands out from the pack, it is more of a question of an individual band taking the time to do something more artistically appreciable.

Capacity. One CD holds about 79 mins of music. An LP will hold no more than about an hour using BOTH sides, so like averaging about 1/2 hour a side. Talk about clunky. So many double albums with a side A, B, C, and D stretched over two vinyl records can be fit on ONE CD, period.

Amoeba Records

Care of your records. CDs get really scratched easily don't they? Only if you don't look after them!
Both vinyl and CDs can have problems with scratches, dust, and other environmental factors if not well looked after. Preserve and store both well, and CDs still come out on top.

As far as raw material decomposition, vinyl lasts longer. But here's the catch. It lasts longer only if NOT PLAYED. A pile of vinyl stored nicely on a shelf in a cool dark room could last ages and ages. Even in the landfill...almost immortal! Ha, sounds more environmental as well don't it, you dirty vinyl licking hippies.
Yet...what good is music if it's not PLAYED right?
Play a vinyl record 100 times over, and there's a very high chance all that needle digging and dust and heat and warping would have degraded the vinyl itself, and therefore the music itself. Vinyl is a physically interpreted medium. It can't be read without a literal needle DIGGING right into its precious flesh. The chances of well preserved vinyl are only good if you take impeccable storage measures and are a master audiophile with a well maintained turntable setup that costs way more than you'd ever like to admit (we're talking stupid, stupid prices here).

by Sorapoison

Play a CD 100 times over. The laser light beam used to read it in no way will contribute to its physical degradation. CDs stored under good conditions will 'only' last approx. 50 to several hundred years as rough estimate. Even if they lasted for the lower number, you'll likely be at geezer hearing aid stage by then anyhow.  If your vinyl had miraculously survived countless plays unscathed to this point, the 'better audio quality' that vinyl purists try to champion wouldn't mean shit to those ears that have experienced hearing loss (and almost no one escapes some form of it once they reach a certain age.) Even if you maintained your hearing perfectly and you were ready to have your stereo rock the dentures out of your mouth it still wouldn't matter. If you were 20something, perfect hearing, just bought a new vinyl record, ready to play it on a kickass system, it wouldn't matter. Why? Because vinyl does not have better sound quality overall. Why?

 Some vinyl diehards will say the sound frequency range of vinyl is roughly 22Hz-up to 30 kHz. It is hard to measure specifically, especially in the low end. The central idea behind vinyl having better sound is that this freq. range is more broad than CD range.

Ok. The human hearing frequency range is from 20 Hz – 20 kHz.  Audio CD range is from 2 Hz-22,050 Hz. What this means is the CD range is 18 Hz lower than the lowest range of human hearing and 2,050 Hz above the highest range of human hearing. Sounds we cannot even hear are well covered by CD. We may not hear these sounds but feel them as vibrations (probably more in the low end with the volume CRANKED..and most of the vibrations one would feel would be within the normal hearing range even so.) Some music hardcores will say feeling these vibrations in our bodies would be all part of the grand listening experience. The bottom range of vinyl is slightly short of our full bass range of hearing. That's WORSE than CD! Or, it is beyond it.. like CD range. It's debatable. As far as the high end, the range is way higher than that of CD even. But we won't really notice these vibrations in a huge way at all, especially compared to the bass end ones. In fact, these could be just as well 100% nonexistent frequencies for all we would know and experience.

One camp will say it is a total myth that vinyl has better sound range than CDs, and that CDs have a better overall dynamic range. A lot of it is placebo effect. Ok, for the sake of argument let's say that it's true that vinyl DOES have a better range than CDs, it still doesn't discount the fact that any extra frequencies would be barely (if at ALL) noticed by ANYONE. The more noticeable frequencies picked up as vibrations would be closer to what's within the CD range, not some frequencies miles and miles out.
Also, the freq. response in vinyl degrades with the wear and tear with the record itself...the more it is played and not stored correctly or cared for. That right, it's not just a question of clicks and pops on well aged and used vinyl, the ENTIRE sound frequency response degrades!!

It's also probably more likely that limitations will show up if you convert vinyl, which is analogue, into digital formats (ie mp3s). With CDs ripped as lossless tracks, there seems to be no real quality loss present.
The converting from vinyl to digital is not always so simple, which is why all vinyl should come with free digital downloads of the tracks, but not all of it does. With CDs you can rip the tracks to virtually any type of digital file at any quality you choose in mere minutes.

Price wise, vinyl is a joke. Unless you are willing to get it used in a cheapies bin, which would mean good chance of wear and tear and worse sound.
Brand new vinyl typically costs FOUR times more than CDs, all items found from the best available price sources. It's a rich man's game. There was a time when vinyl and tapes were the norm, and CDs were just coming out. THAT was a time vinyl was way cheaper brand new, but unless you build a time machine, vinyl remains this niche collector's thing (making a real comeback) YET at a ridiculous price. CDs themselves are overpriced for what they are, so imagine how criminal it is that vinyl should cost even more!

Availability is another issue. To just get a bit of this and that, sure, whatever. Yet isn't vinyl supposed to be mainly for serious collectors? Serious collectors really go all out to get a zillion and one releases if they can help it. You'll only be able to get something like 20% of the albums you can get on CD. Some albums never even make it out as vinyl even once! Sure, there's always the flipside of the odd obscure record you can only find on vinyl that never made it to CD or is no longer on CD, but good luck hunting it down, and overall there are way more albums in CD form than vinyl, especially if you are talking about fairly modern music.

UPDATE: Was just reading another article that mentioned COLORED vinyl wears down faster than normal vinyl. So it's a cool visual collector's item but degrades quicker. ALSO the article stated that most new vinyl releases and re-issues are sourced from DIGITAL material, so all that analogue wonderfulness is basically lost from the get-go, and people are getting tricked into buying vinyl thinking it's so much better!!

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Outro/The Only Defense of Vinyl:

To be fair, vinyl has only one thing going for it that makes it 'better' than CDs. It can only be described as 'vinyl magic'. Vinyl magic is a certain fun factor, a warmth of sound, an experience. Because vinyl is analogue, the sound is perceived to be more 'warm'. This works pretty well for a lot of vintage classic rock albums, say. Because at the time... the stuff was recorded on shittier equipment, played on shittier equipment, and so forth. So a warmer sound is more complimentary and gives a more authentic feeling that you are transported back in time. Some crazy electronica album from last year? NO real proof that it'll sound better with that warm vinyl sound. It may actually sound worse. It's kinda like how if you watched old black and white movies on a shitty old TV set, it would have more charm to it instead of some super HD plasma flatscreen.

It's fun to listen to vinyl, to pull the record out, smell it, viscerally put it on. Play with the pitch shifting and speed (though that may wear the record down faster).
Dusty crusty clicks and pops? Maybe they too are part of vinyl magic, the experience and for some, nostalgia. Vinyl also tends to force one to actually sit back and relax and listen to a whole album in order, the way it was meant to be. Get up to flip to side B..that's the only interruption. Maybe well due. A drink and piss break. No shuffled playlists. No quick kills. An experience. More organic maybe? Let the ashes fall on the sleeve. Let smoke and sound waves fill the air. The artwork is more likely to be appreciated if it's larger. These kind of things, they are all part of vinyl magic. But if you are getting vinyl convinced it'll prolly never wear out, it has better overall sound than CDs, you don't like messes, you are lying to yourself about how cheap it is, and so forth (basically any reasons outside of true 'vinyl magic') then DON'T WASTE YOUR TIME! CDs are better!! Don't kid yourself! CDs beat Vinyl! Actually, in the end, I end up buying both depending on what seems to work best for a given moment!

*see also: http://fox-actors.blogspot.com/2011/08/why-i-still-buy-records-or.html

It's vinyl magic...

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                                                      If she walked away, did she think her reflection would stay?